M. Giant's
Velcrometer
Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks


Wednesday, January 23, 2013  

M. Ovie Reviews: 2012

I'm a little behind on my movie blogging, in more ways than one. By this time last year, I'd seen three movies in the theater, as opposed to the current 2013 total of zero (not that Trash hasn't encouraged me to go -- I just haven't felt like it). I never did get around to reviewing any of the movies I saw in the last quarter of 2012 -- or I did, but never got around to posting the results. And here it is with scarcely a week of January left and I'm just now posting my rankings of all the films I saw in 2012. You'd think I could have at least done this before the Golden Globes, or at least the Oscar nominations. I'd feel really bad about my lateness if I thought anyone cared.

But as the saying goes, better late than never. As long as we're ranking things, you can decide for yourself if that's true.

28. New Year's Eve. Execrable.

27. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace 3D. Naked money grab.

26. Ted. Juvenile, obvs.

25. Seven Psychopaths. Misogynistic.

24. Ice Age: Continental Drift. Left me cold.

23. Prometheus. Frustrating, gorgeous, mute-worthy.

22. Robot and Frank. Mostly not bad, but what didn't work really didn't work.

21. Frankenweenie. Burton's now so out of ideas he's mining his own back catalog. And I'm not just bitter because it scared M. Edium shitless.

20. Bernie. True stories don't always make the best movies.

19. The Grey. Downer.

18. The Woman in Black. Jumptastic.

17. The Amazing Spider-Man. Unnecessary.

16. Wreck-It Ralph. Cute. Still poor man's Pixar, though.

15. Django Unchained. Problematic. Deeply.

14. The Hunger Games. Compelling.

13. Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol. Better than expected.

12. The Master. Virtuosically off-putting.

11. The Hobbit. Dumb, but I never got tired of looking at it.

10. Moonrise Kingdom. Virtuosically idiosyncratic.

9. Skyfall. Mostly not silly.

8. Argo. Show-offy, but it works. Amazed to see that the top of Ben Affleck's head is actually round.

7. The Dark Knight Rises. Big damn movie.

6. Chronicle. Underappreciated genius.

5. Lincoln. Overappreciated genius.

4. Looper. Probably the movie I thought about the most afterward, not counting Django and for less troubling reasons.

3. The Artist.. So damn clever.

2. The Avengers. Damn near perfect.

1. Cabin in the Woods. Perfect.

There you go. You may disagree, you may think I'm crazy. That's certainly your right. Everybody's allowed to be wrong sometimes. Why can't it be you?

Thanks, and I'll look forward to doing this again with you next April.

posted by M. Giant 10:16 PM 0 comments

0 Comments:

Post a Comment


Listed on BlogShares www.blogwise.com
ads!
buy my books!
professional representation
Follow me on Twitter
donate!
ads
Pictures
notify
links
loot
mobile
other stuff i
wrote
about
archives