Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks
Wednesday, September 09, 2009 Three-Fer
I'm coming to you from Sioux Falls, which is not my favorite city in the Midwest (or my favorite city in eastern South Dakota, for that matter), but we're on our way back from a family vacay in the Black Hills and the hotel has Internet and an indoor water park, so here we are.
It's been ten years since we've been to this part of the country (and a first for M. Edium, who loved most of it), so there's a lot to tell you about. But for now, I just want to share with you a little tale from our last trip there.
This was ten years ago, when Trash, my then-bandmate Kraftmatik, his wife The Krank, and I all took a long, looping road trip whose apex was way the hell down in Las Vegas. We hit a lot of stops along the way, including a couple of days in the Black Hills. You'd think four people crammed into a rented minivan with too much camping equipment and a couple of guitars would have gotten on each other's nerves more, but it didn't really happen that way. I will say that we all got to know each other really well.
For instance, I developed this habit of claiming anything visible out my window as "mine." As you can imagine, I built up quite a collection. Bet you didn't know that I'm the proud owner of, among other things, a herd of bison, several mountains, and the Grand Canyon.
Trash, on the other hand, hates to pay for firewood when she's camping. She much prefers to scavenge what has fallen to the ground, where it's free and all you have to do is cut it up and/or drag it back to your campsite. Now, there's not a whole lot of deadfall near the camping areas because most of it gets picked up by people who are just as cheap as Trash, but on the hills surrounding the long, winding roadways between Mount Rushmore and our campsite, there's always a mother lode of fallen trees that Trash just can't stop herself from audibly wishing that she could scoop up, drag back to the tent, and set fire to.
And Kraftmatik, like others at the time, had a tendency to repeat words that made him happy in a happy Homer Simpson moan. Like, he would utter a sentence that ended in the word "beer" and then repeat, "beeer." Or it wouldn't even have to be a whole sentence; it could be just "Beer. Beeeeer."
I can't even tell you what the Krank's thing was, because one day she just got all of us. We were driving around Custer State Park in the Black Hills and she looked up a hill and suddenly said, "My wood. Woood.
In other words, she mocked all three of us, on three separate levels, using only three words. I have never heard anybody take down that many separate people that efficiently, and I don't see how I ever will again.
Unless of course I can somehow find myself in the position of being able to mock three people with one three-letter word -- one letter each. It could happen, right?
More on our trip over the next week. No slides, though, I promise. posted by M. Giant 9:08 PM 1 comments
That's impressive. She totally should have gotten some sort of award or commemorative plaque for that.