Velcrometer

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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Bachelor Weekend

I'll be spending this Father's Day as a single dad. Trash is quite disappointed that she has to spend the holiday traveling to Seattle for a conference instead of pampering me, but she's giving me a great gift even so: she's taking a cab to the airport for her early-morning flight instead of making me and M. Small get up to drive her there. Even if she doesn't know it yet.

So I guess my question to you is: what do two young, handsome single, men of wildly divergent heights do in this town for half a week? When proposing suggestions, please keep in mind the following:

1. Obviously we've got all of Sunday, but he's got school and I've got work the rest of the week, so a road trip is off the table. Shucky-darn.
2. Besides, only one of us can drive. Admittedly, the concept of the designated driver is something of a mockery anyway, considering the fake ID I was going to use to get him into the clubs hasn't arrived yet.
3. He's already seen Kung Fu Panda. Not that he minds watching things twice, but he's never as attentive the second time and it's his interest in the film that keeps him manageable in a big dark room full of strangers. You'd be amazed at how hard it is to find a movie theater in this town where the seats have five-point restraints and ball gags. Besides, I can just see him blurting spoilers all through the thing, and I hate that.

I asked M. Small himself what he wanted to do, and of course his suggestion was "park crawl." In case it's not evident from the name, a park crawl is when you go to more than one park in succession. It's one of his favorite things to do Our record is four parks in one weeknight, but given a full Sunday we could probably blow that away, weather permitting. Weather not permitting, I guess there's always the indoor water park, but I don't want to be away from my cell phone for that long when Trash is out of town. I get separation anxiety, you know.

And I would spend the day taking him shopping for my Father's Day gift, but Trash already took care of that in advance. So I can't really justify making him buy me that riding lawnmower with the built-in toolshed and barbecue grill. Pity. I suppose I could teach him to load the dishwasher and pack his own lunches. That would be a gift that keeps on giving.

Whatever we do, though, I'm looking forward to it. A Father's Day of intensive, solo fathering. Quite apropos, actually.
You? Me? You? Me?

posted by M. Giant 7:24 PM 13 comments

13 Comments:

Dairy Queen. Nuggets. Cold Fudge. Make it happen Dad.

By Unknown, at June 10, 2008 at 8:25 PM

I envy your mad photoshop skills.

What about MOA for Father's Day? The new Nick park is kinda fun. And by fun I mean it has more rides than Camp Snoopy did.

By Jen, at June 10, 2008 at 9:53 PM

Dude: www.waterproofcases.net.

By Anonymous, at June 11, 2008 at 7:50 AM

My suggestions revolve around things I remember my Dad doing with me, though not necessarily on Father's Day:

-Taking me fishing (or taking M Small to do something you enjoy)
-Teaching me how to play catch (he seems to be at an age to start- or start soccer training if you aren't a baseball kind of guy)
-Taking me to the coffee shop- There were four of us kids in my family and he took each one us with him to town separately for coffee and apple turnovers and talking with the old farmers, and every one of us absolutely cherishes those memories most.

One of the cool things you get to do as a parent is start all new traditions. So, you could make every Father's Day weekend time for the two of yu to do special stuff together.

By Auburn Tiger, at June 11, 2008 at 11:00 AM

How young is too young for mini-golf? Both the Walker and the Science Museum have mini golf courses set up for the summer months.

By Carrie Ann, at June 11, 2008 at 11:06 AM

Although I predict it’s actually going to be nice this weekend, you should let Trash know that she should prepare for weather (just in case) that is colder than Siberia. It’s true, out of 8 major cities in Siberia – 5 are warm as or warmer than Seattle right now.

Seattle – 50
Barnaul – 54
Kemerovo – 50
Novosibirsk – 59
Omsk – 54
Tomsk – 54

And if the sun is out, Seattle is going to be crazy. We’ve been sun deprived for way too long now! :)

By Anonymous, at June 11, 2008 at 1:16 PM

@Jen - That's MS Paint, dude. PhotoShop is a crutch for people who...uh...own PhotoShop.

Seriously, I just decided to quit letting my lack of photo manipulation skills or software get in the way of manipulating photos.

By M. Giant, at June 11, 2008 at 1:19 PM

The Walking with Dinosaurs exhibit at the Excel runs through Sunday and looks really interesting-

By Anonymous, at June 11, 2008 at 2:24 PM

Well, since the other commenters have suggested high-class, edifying ways with which to spend Father's Day (and the following week) such as museum exhibits and nature-related activities, it is left to me to suggest other activities of a different cultural nature.....

Seems to me you'll have plenty of time to help M. Small perfect his "pull my finger" routine, and still have a good chunk of time with which to hold several marathon burping contests and memorize an endless supply of bad jokes before Trash returns from her conference. These were all things my dad did with his three kids when we were growing up. Yes indeed, with all three of his daughters. :D

We took our kiddo mini-golfing for the first time at age 3, so in all seriousness, I can recommend that as a more-likely-to-be-Trash-approved activity. If you haven't done that with M. Small yet, it is a LOT of fun. Along with the weapon of mass destruction that is conveniently kid-sized and a brightly-colored ball, there are also those teeny pencils and paper in case one suddenly feels the need to create some art mid-hole. Also, younger kids tend to make up their own rules, which keep the game quite interesting.

Happy Father's Day in advance - I'm sure you two will have a blast together whatever you do.

By Heather, at June 11, 2008 at 3:44 PM

It's too bad road trips aren't possible, because I remember the long and happy hours my parents spent playing Come To New York And Help Aunt Linda Move with me.

By Linda, at June 11, 2008 at 4:24 PM

Don't listen to Linda. There's nothing better than an old-fashioned Come to Northern CA and Help a Random Velcrometer Fan and Family Pack Up Their House.

- JeniMull

By Williams Family, at June 11, 2008 at 8:38 PM

i'm kinda liking the image, it's alternative.

By Honey, at June 13, 2008 at 12:52 PM

Happy Belated Father's Day!

By Teslagrl, at June 16, 2008 at 8:28 AM

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