M. Giant's
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Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks


Thursday, December 28, 2006  

My Year in Movies

It’s that time of year when movie critics make their best and worst of the year lists. I decided to do that myself. Shouldn’t take too long, since I see about three or four movies a year these days. Counting only movies I saw in the theater, here goes, in chronological order:

Good Night and Good Luck
I’ve already gone on about this film at length, so I won’t say more, except to add that it kind of shows a little insecurity on Clooney’s part to put two “Good”s in the title, just to make sure that every review of it, positive or negative, would have to do the same. He’s also in The Good German. I look forward to the culmination of his black-and-white trilogy, which will no doubt be titled Good, Good, Good Movie Good.

Take the Lead
Beyond crap. Take every ballroom dancing movie and every teacher-makes-a-difference-in-the-lives-of-inner-city-kids-who-in-real-life-would-have-knifed-him-in-the-first-reel movie, scan them all into Final Draft, print it out, throw the whole thing off a freeway overpass and pay homeless guys a buck each to recover as many pages as they can, cast Antonio Banderas, and there you go. I saw it in Vegas with a bunch of TWoP recappers, because if you’re paying to sit and make fun of a bad movie, you should do it with the people who are best at it. And with the worst possible movie. Probably not what the filmmakers were going for, but I consider it money well spent.

Snakes on a Plane
Despite all the pre-release hype, the air got let out of this faster than a 747 with two windows shot out. Kind of unfair, really. I got exactly what I expected, except even more snakes and an even bigger plane. Bonus: seeing Todd Louiso, who played Dick in High Fidelity, as the snake specialist. It’s not every day you get to say “Dick the Herpetologist.”

Casino Royale
Zen Viking and I have seen every Bond movie in the theater together since A View to a Kill (not in the same theater, mind you; at least two of them don’t exist any more), back when Roger Moore was still Bond, Grace Jones was still scary, and Duran Duran was a strikingly modern choice to do the theme song. That's, like, over a third of the entire series, dude. We are very old. On the other hand, most people who were old enough to get into Dr. No back in the day are now dead, so that's to our advantage.

Although I thought Brosnan deserved a longer run (but don't mind me; I'm something of a Dalton apologist, for Chrissakes), I loved Casino Royale. The action was active, funny bits were actually funny, and Brutus from Rome plays M's piss-boy. My only quibbles: we’ve seen Bond sail off into the sunset so many times that when we follow him afterward for as long as we do this time, it’s clear that something’s up. Otherwise the credits would be rolling by now. And also, if you’re a bad guy, is it really a good idea to tie your captive on the road in hopes that the person speeding to rescue her will swerve avoid her just in time, but crashing his car in the process just enough to incapacitate him? Kind of iffy, when you need them both alive. Oh, and Eva Green's voice sounds like she's constantly trying to swallow a beehive. Other than that, awesome flick.

And that's all the movies I saw in the theater in 2006 (so far). I do enjoy going to movies, and I wish I had time to do it more. On the plus side, however, this way I don't get so worked up about the Oscars.

posted by M. Giant 9:42 PM 4 comments

4 Comments:

A View to a Kill was on Spike the other day, and it turns out Grace Jones is no longer all that scary. At least, not as scary as a youngish Christopher Walken with blond hair. Eeeek.

And OMFG, I had no idea our run stretched back into the Moore era. It's as if I conveniently jettison the oldest few months' or years' worth of memories. That, or I confuse the stuff I saw myself with the stuff I saw Michael Ian Black talk about.

Don't apologize for your twisted affinity for Dalton. He was aces in Flash Gordon, and the world just wasn't ready for his rougher Bond. And anyway, my favorite Bond movie is still the one with Lazenby, so there you go.

-ZV, Feb, whatever

By Blogger Febrifuge, at December 29, 2006 at 1:56 AM  

Mr Craig did indeed make for the best 007 in many, many years .. I just hope he's now taking some well-deserved time out to gloat to all the haters who doubted he could pull this off

By Blogger Reel Fanatic, at December 29, 2006 at 2:09 PM  

Thank you so much for validating my aversion to Eva Green's delivery. I kept leaning over to my friend and saying, "Does she always talk like that? Is she just trying to be sultry? Does she have a condition?"

Now if only something could be done about her eye makeup.

By Blogger Mike, at December 30, 2006 at 8:21 AM  

As to the eye makeup, I blame Johnny Depp. Arrrrr!

By Blogger Febrifuge, at December 30, 2006 at 1:54 PM  

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