M. Giant's
Velcrometer
Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks


Friday, March 04, 2005  

Moving Moments

Last weekend, Trash's brother, her sister-in-law, and our three-year-old niece Deniece moved back to Minnesota from Iowa, where they've lived for the past two and a half years. Now they're four blocks away from us. Trash and I helped with the move. A few treasured memories from that weekend:

1. Driving nearly three and a half hours nonstop while M. Tiny slept in his car seat the entire time.

2. Getting to pee after driving nearly three and a half hours nonstop.

3. Coming out of the bathroom, taking a look around Brother-In-Law’s house and seeing that it was already almost empty as my bladder now was. Yes!

4. Observing that the moving truck had been loaded of everything except large items.

5. Realizing that helping with large items would have to wait while I helped with making M. Tiny’s bottle.

6. Ending up helping with, like, five pieces of furniture.

7. Reaching the top of the basement stairs with my side of a nine-ton flatscreen TV and realizing that not only had I not voided my back’s warranty, I was also not quite dizzy enough from the effort to actually pass out.

8. Realizing that since M. Tiny and Deniece were spending the night at their grandma’s house, which meant that I would be able to sleep in the next morning.

9. Walking into our Iowa karaoke bar for the last time.

10. Walking out of our Iowa karaoke bar for the last time, about forty-five long minutes later. Those chicks were seriously irritating, dude.

11. Waking up at 6:30 the next morning and realizing I could go back to sleep, which could only have been better if we weren’t sleeping on the floor at the time.

12. Bringing up the rear of a three-car caravan back to Minneapolis: Trash’s mom driving our niece Deniece in the front, Trash driving M. Tiny in my car in the middle, and myself driving BIL’s Jeep with the nine-ton flatscreen TV in the back, which allowed me to pop a 240-mile wheelie.

13. Passing BIL’s new house on the way home, 99.99% of the way into the trip.

14. Getting to spend Sunday evening at home with Trash, her mom, M. Tiny, Deniece, Trash's sister Lisa, Lisa's Heterosexual Life Partner, Heterosexual Life Partner's husband, and their five-year-old daughter (it's complicated).

15. Meeting BIL at the new house to unload the trucks on Monday evening after work, only to discover that the moving van was entirely empty, and the only reason that the Jeep hadn’t also been unloaded was because I had just driven it over from our house.

16. Not having to carry the nine-ton flatscreen TV down the stairs of the new house.

17. Going home to watch 24 after only an hour and a half of “helping.”

18. After 24, driving Deniece to her new house, so she could see her new bedroom all set up and spend her first night there.

19. Singing the ABC song in the car on the way there, and arriving when we hit “P” the second time around.

20. Bringing Deniece into her new house, where her parents were waiting for her, and hearing her sing out, "I’m hooome!"

Today's best search phrase: "show me a food web and what is going to hapen to it if we remove a pests." No.

posted by M. Giant 8:04 PM 11 comments

11 Comments:

I must know - Lisa and HLP and HLP wife and daughter combo? My brain is cramping...please explicate.

Judester

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 4, 2005 at 8:55 PM  

I must know - Lisa and HLP and HLP wife and daughter combo? My brain is cramping...please explicate.

Judester

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 4, 2005 at 8:55 PM  

I must know - Lisa and HLP and HLP wife and daughter combo? My brain is cramping...please explicate.

Judester

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 4, 2005 at 8:56 PM  

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 5, 2005 at 12:29 PM  

My guess: HLP's husband is transgendered. He started off as wife of HLP but has since transitioned. Am I right? Do I get a cookie?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 5, 2005 at 7:33 PM  

okay..."Trash's sister Lisa, Lisa's Heterosexual Life Partner, Heterosexual Life Partner's husband, and their five-year-old daughter (it's complicated)."
Complicated it may be, but try us. We gotta know.

By OldestWeetFan(it's complicated),

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 5, 2005 at 9:01 PM  

Unless I'm entirely mistaking the confusion here... "Heterosexual Life Partner" is a reference to a particular Jay/Silent Bob leitmotif, which would mean that HLP is a LADY, making her and her husband having a baby... an entirely straightforward matter of biology.

Or perhaps I am the most confused of us all.

- Daffybroad

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 5, 2005 at 10:09 PM  

Daffybroad wins!

By Blogger M. Giant, at March 6, 2005 at 6:21 AM  

but how does sister Lisa relate to Heterosexual Life Partner?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 7, 2005 at 5:47 AM  

And just how many sisters does Trash have?

By Anonymous Anonymous, at March 7, 2005 at 7:03 AM  

You could have a longtime HLP, then one of you meets someone and gets married. Who is to say that we can only have one committed life partner? Frankly, I think a lot of people seem as close, in some ways closer, with their best friend as with their spouse. Also, men and women meet different needs in our lives, whether we are straight, gay, or bi. To me it feels very natural to have both a man and a woman in my life who I have a committed lifetime partnership with, although the nature of the relationship is unique with each. -D

By Anonymous Anonymous, at September 14, 2009 at 5:06 PM  

Post a Comment


Listed on BlogShares www.blogwise.com
ads!
buy my books!
professional representation
Follow me on Twitter
donate!
ads
Pictures
notify
links
loot
mobile
other stuff i
wrote
about
archives