M. Giant's
Velcrometer
Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks


Saturday, January 15, 2005  

Hello goodday

Got this in my inbox this week:

Hello goodday,

Hello to you, and goodday to your friend the former Secretary of the Exchequer of Nigeria.

We would like to offer you a part/full time jobs

You would, would you? Just to clarify, because there seems to be some ambiguity: would you like to offer me part or full time? Would you like to offer me a job, or jobs? And as long as we're making ourselves clear here, are you sure you're offering a job/jobs and not vacation?

The jobs can be done with group or single person

No couples, I see. Could be kinky.

No age limit, don't need any experience

I must admit, I am intrigued by the prospect of working with otherwise unemployable septuagenarians who have never had a job of any kind.

Must haved computer with internet

Oops, we run into a little trouble there. See, I still have a computer with internet. I've haved it for almost ten years now. If you're asking me to get rid of it, that could be a deal-breaker.

No time limit also no limit for your income

Are you saying that the longer I work, the more I get paid? How do they expect to stay out of the red with a business model built around this crazy moon logic?

The payment will be transfer direct into your account

Again, please say goodday to your friend the former Secretary of the Exchequer of Nigeria.

Any question or info please send your
Name and with the word "Okey" in the subject line


What if I want my question or info before I say "okey?" Is that "okey" legally binding in the absence of a properly appended "dokey?"

Thanks and sorry for disturb.

No, thank you. And sorry for mock.

Today's best search phrase: "Trap tuna in your garage." If your garage is currently in a position where it's possible to trap tuna in it, maybe fishing shouldn't be your highest priority right now.

posted by M. Giant 7:29 PM 0 comments

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