M. Giant's
Velcrometer Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
Humpblog (4/07/04)
Last October, I went to the post office near my work. The guy behind the counter was wearing a Three Stooges tie.
I mailed something else in February. He was again wearing the Three Stooges tie.
I thought to myself, rather snottily, I'm here twice in five months and he's wearing the same tie both times? Is that the only tie he owns?
I've been in there several times in the past month, mailing off books that we've sold on eBay and Amazon. And now I can say with a fair degree of certainty that yes, he does own only the one tie.
Although sometimes, for variety, he twists it around so the back of it is showing.
* * *
Trash used to know somebody who worked at a Volkswagen dealership. All the time they would get calls from people saying, "I'm responding to the ad."
"What ad?"
"Drivers wanted."
True story.
* * *
Throughout history, science has made any number of discoveries that are entirely accidental. I can't imagine that this could be one of them.
Drinking pig worm eggs to prevent a bowel disease that I might never get anyway? Thanks, but I'd rather get sick.
* * *
Remember that Boston Market BBQ Chicken Sandwich I told you about a few months ago? I do too. Sadly, all I can do is remember it. It's not on their menu any more.
I went in there a couple of weeks ago to pick one up and their menu is completely changed. I asked about it and the lady behind the counter said blithely, "We're not doing chicken breasts any more." Just like that. She might as well have ripped my heart out of my chest and showed it to me.
The least she could have done was wrap it in paper so I could say goodbye.
* * *
Today's best search phrase: "Surgery involves snipping the thin tissue under the tongue to make it longer and supposedly nimble." AHHHHH! AHHHHHHHGH! OW!
Besides, can you imagine what happens when the pig worm eggs get in there?
posted by M. Giant
3:15 PM
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