M. Giant's
Throwing stuff at the internet to see what sticks

Friday, December 13, 2002  

I still don’t have a TiVo, but I entered a sweepstakes to win one. I really shouldn’t link to it like that, because the more there are of you who enter, the smaller my chances of winning. Then again, I could always appeal to your sense of karma and count on the winner to pass the prize along to the guy who hooked you up. I’m just saying.

* * *

We’re going to Austin!

No particular reason. It’s not for business, we don’t have relatives there, and SXSW won’t be going on. It’s just that a Minnesota winter can be pretty grim if you try to get through it all in one sitting. So we like to head for more southerly latitudes for a few days every January, but we prefer to go to places we’ve never been to while avoiding the MTV Spring Break-type destinations (yes, we know Spring Break isn’t until a few months later, but you can’t be too careful). So this year we’re going to Austin. Last year we went to Georgia, and the year before we went to New Orleans. Apparently it’s always Spring Break on Bourbon Street, but we didn’t know that then, okay? Get your filthy mitts off my beads, dammit!

Anyway, since you guys came through so spectacularly on tips for our trip to Seattle, I’m putting out a call for suggestions of things for us to do in Austin. Omar has already graciously offered to show us around, and we’ll happily take him up on it, but he’s got a life of his own and can’t be expected to baby-sit us for five days. That’s your job.

So e-mail me. Tell me about the things you like to do in Austin, the things we should see, the places we should eat, the bands we should hear, the bars we should drink in (and not just the one where Jenna Bush got arrested, either). I’ll even trust you not to purposely suggest things you know will suck because you think those kind of experiences will make for good blog entries. They do, I agree, but that’s an excellent way to get yourself an engraved invitation to an exclusive gathering in Hell.

We’re going to be there (Austin, not Hell) January 8 through 13. Any tips you all have are welcome This is one of the cool things about having a blog that nobody tells you about: access to an interactive travel guide.

Of course, you let us down on New York and we ended up with nothing to do but sit and stare at each other in Lawre’s apartment for four days. This is your chance to redeem yourselves.

* * *

We’re also considering the possibility of a trip to Las Vegas. And not just because I think you haven’t read enough about Sin City on other Damn Hell Ass Kings sites this week. Our friends in Michigan say they’re going in February and we’re thinking about latching on to their excursion like the joy-sucking parasites we are. We don’t have plane tickets yet, but we have reserved a hotel room at the same place they’re staying.

Ever notice that when you say you’re going to Vegas, people always ask you, “where are you staying?” and you tell them, and they always know where it is? I can’t wait for people to start asking me that about this trip. I mean, I literally can’t wait. I’m answering a question I haven’t been asked about a trip that hasn’t been confirmed yet, and I’m gong to do it right now.

If we go, we’re staying at the Westward Ho Rear.

It actually exists. It’s actually called that. We’ll have to tell our parents that “You can reach us at the Westward Ho Rear.” We’ll get into taxicabs on Fremont Avenue at four in the morning drunk on complimentary cocktails and garish casino carpeting and financially liberating gains at the Pai-Gow table, and we’ll have to articulate the phrase “Westward Ho Rear.” We’ll send our grandmothers postcards from the Westward Ho Rear. God, I love Vegas.

And I haven’t even told you the best part yet.

It’s thirty dollars a night.

Westward Ho Rear. Thirty dollars a night.

A whole weekend going in and out of the back entrance of a thirty-dollar-a-night Ho. Sounds like heaven to me.

posted by M. Giant 3:33 PM 0 comments


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